Romeo and Ariadne
by AriadneLovesRomeo
Summary: This is my sequel to Romeo and Juliet. It turns out that the events in the play were all the plot of my character Ariadne to have Juliet bumped off so that she be with her beloved Romeo. Or is this all just Ariasdne's imagination?
1. Chapter 1

_Authors note: These are the first three chapters in my sequel to Romeo and Juliet. I hope you like reading it as much as I liked writing it. ^_^ _

Chapter one: One hand, one Heart

My name is Ariadne I am young and quite wild. I am also a little shy and have a funny dimple when I smile; I am told that my lips are as soft as petals. I have hair the colour of the sun and I am in love. The man I love is called Romeo and we live together in the city of Verona and this is the tale of our life together.

I was standing in the graveyard in the Capulet crypt, there were three bodies on the floor one was my beloved Romeo and the other was that whore Juliet. How I hated that manipulative bitch she had tried to steal away my handsome Romeo, I was glad she was dead she deserved it, I spat on her pale and ugly face she deserved that too. I walked away from her corpse and over to my Romeo even in death he was gorgeous although he wasn't really dead anyway so maybe that was why. I took out the small vile of smelling salts from the pocket of my beautiful purple dress with gold embroidered roses and popped the cork and placed them under Romeo's nose. He awoke with a gasp "is she gone?" he asked. "Yes my love now we can be together forever" I replied. He grabbed me and pulled my face close to his I could smell his musky manliness, it made me feel a little faint his scent was heavenly, he then began to kiss me passionately his tongue began to probe my mouth. I really wanted him my body ached with longing but I knew we couldn't do it here I had to wait until we were married. Romeo managed to pull away from our lip lock and stood up.

"I'm so glad our plan worked" I said "Yes" he replied "I knew that sleeping potion from the apothecary would make her think I was dead and I knew if she thought that I was dead she would kill herself with my dagger, The Plan worked perfectly". Now all we needed to do was replace Romeos body so that it would look like a tragic suicide pact "I did as you asked Romeo and brought Mercutio's body you'd better change clothes with him and I'll cut his hair so he looks more like you". Romeo quickly swapped clothes with his dead best friend who looked surprisingly like Romeo and we both ran out of the Crypt just in time to avoid bumping into Prince Escalus and the two families who were for some reason visiting the crypt. "My love we'd better skip town before news gets out about my death" Romeo said to me "what's wrong dear?" he asked me, I was sobbing; I had never been out of the city walls and was quite scared about leaving "where will we go?" I asked trying to disguise the panic in my voice. Romeos answer surprised me "we will go to...New York City" he said "but first we will be wed; we must go down south to...London"

Chapter two: Run, freedom, run!

The next day after packing my array of beautiful clothes and jewellery Romeo and I left my grand East Verona town house with its ornate art deco exterior and headed from the north of England to London in the south. For the journey I had decided to wear my scarlet silk dress with it regal high collar its sleeves came down to my elbows and it was covered with intricate embroidered butterflies, on my head I placed my gold; diamond encrusted diadem that Romeo had bought me for my birthday. Romeo said I truly looked like a princess, I had always thought I was quite ugly but somehow he was in love with me and I wasn't going to complain. We placed all of our suitcases onto the back of the carriage. The carriage was covered with gold leaf and had beautiful carvings of cherubs and fawns on it "it's a bit conspicuous, isn't it?" Romeo said "Nah it'll be fine whose going to be looking for us anyway? and even if someone is, hide in plain sight I always say" I replied. Romeo helped me into the carriage by holding my hand as I climbed into it, he himself went and sat on the driver's seat and with a loud "hyah" and the crack of a whip we were moving. I sat there on the lovely leather interior seats surrounded by the beautiful mahogany walls of the carriage contemplating what we had accomplished in just a few days. We had freed Romeo of that contemptuous, vulgar, leeching, harlot of a wife of his. How I had hated her with her slutty ways she made me feel sick.

The carriage jerked to a stop which brought me from my thoughts of hatred. "Is everything alright Romeo?" I called poking my head out of the carriage window "Yes we're at the city gate and they want to see out travel papers" Romeo shouted back. My stomach sank, we didn't have any travel papers what where we going to do. "So do you have the papers or not?" said a rather grotesque looking guard in a sandpaper bass. "Umm...well...no" Romeo reluctantly admitted "then there isn't a hope in hell of you leaving town, turn back NOW!" said the gargoyle of a guard. It was then that Rome did something that rather shocked me; he took out his rapier and slashed across the guard's throat causing a spray of red to come from the guard. The guard's hands grasped at the wound and he fell to the ground making horrible gargling sounds.

I couldn't believe what Romeo had just done, he had killed another man for me, it proved that he loved me; he was the best fiancé a girl could have. "Hold on tight Ariadne we need to escape this town and fast, so I may have to drive a little recklessly" and with that and a crack of his whip we were on the move again and when he had said fast he had certainly meant it. I glanced back towards the town that had been my home for eighteen year and bode it farewell, it was then that I noticed the angry mob coming toward us from the city. They were riding horses and carrying torches, pitch forks and some even had bows and arrows "ROMEO! THEY HAVE FLAMING ARROWS QUICK PUT A FOOT ON IT!" I shouted "yes dear" he replied and he cracked the whip again. We were going at an incredible speed now, too fast for the mob. A few arrows nearly hit the carriage but none of the mob seemed to be great archers so we escaped unscathed.

After six hours of travel and with Verona fifty miles behind us we decided to stop at a quaint little inn somewhere near Nottingham. We asked a gentleman standing outside the inn if there was anywhere to put the horses and carriage and he very kindly offered us the use of his stables and more kindly still told us to leave them with him to take care of while we went and got a room for the night. I offered him payment of three gold sovereigns but he refused and told me that he couldn't take that sort of money from such a beautiful lady, he then told us his name was Aristophanes and that he and his wife Amalthea ran the Inn. So with the horses safely being put into stables we went into the Inn and where greeted by a plump and matronly looking woman with a beaming smile "welcome to the Richard III Inn" she said "you must be Amalthea nice to meet you" said Romeo "Yes" she said "Nice to meet you too. You two look hungry and you must be cold, I mean with the weather what it is, get yerselves by the hearth and I'll bring ye a bowl of our famous eternal stew we haven't emptied the pot since 1256 ya know". Eternal stew sounded odd, a stew that had been around for over two hundred years couldn't taste nice could it? Romeo and I sat by the fire warmed ourselves, he put his arm around me. "Wow I can't believe it; we finally did it we have finally escaped that awful town and that stupid feud between my family and the Capulets and that conniving bitch Juliet" Romeo Said "I love you, you know Romeo, I don't think I could have lived another day with you married to that poisonous cancer of a woman" we then kissed; his wet lips touching mine, his warm mouth was mine and no one else's. We kissed for what seemed like forever until we heard a "ahem" from behind us we both turned to look it was Amalthea with two large wooden Bowls filled to the brim with stew. She passed us the bowls "it may not be gourmet cuisine but it's filling and tasty and I'm sure ye'll enjoy it. After ye've finished that ye can go up to room three a've made up two beds for ye. A know it's not ideal but it's all we have on such short notice, Please enjoy ye stay" she said. We thanked her and she left us to eat the stew which after a little apprehension we both had a taste of and found to our surprise to be quite delicious. We then went to bed eager to get to London the next day.

The next day I awoke to find Romeo's bed empty I guessed he'd left me sleeping so I would have enough energy for today's travel. I had a quick bath in the steel bath tub at the foot of the bed which had been filled with piping hot water while I had been sleeping, God Romeo was thoughtful, no man was as perfect as him. I then got dressed. I put on a gorgeous flowing cream dress with lots of silver lace embellishments, it was encrusted with various different gemstones; emeralds, diamonds, sapphires, rubies and malachite. The dress was low cut so it showed off my décolletage, I placed two lovely pearl earrings into my ears and placed a silver diadem on my head the outfit was complete. "You look like a goddess" said a voice from behind me, it was Romeo "I feel like one" I replied. He kissed me passionately "come on sweetie Amalthea and Aristophanes have made us breakfast" I followed Romeo down stairs. When Amalthea and Aristophanes saw me their jaws dropped "your look simply divine darling" said Aristophanes "and you're such a nice person, I wish I was so lucky" said Amalthea "with a body like yours I could run a very different business" "don't be so hash on yourself you have a great body" I lied. She laughed and ushered us to the table where we ate scrambled eggs and bacon it was like sex, well I guessed it was since I was still a virgin, what Amalthea lacked in looks she sure made up for in culinary prowess. "Where are you two heading today then?" asked Aristophanes "were going to London" said Romeo "what's a handsome man like you going to London for?" Aristophanes queried "we're getting married" I told him. He seemed disappointed "Is something wrong" I asked him "I was just hoping to see more of Rom...err the two of you" he answered. I suddenly realised he was clearly a homosexual I wondered if Amalthea knew. I didn't think it wise to tell her. So I just shut my mouth.

After breakfast we were escorted by Aristophanes to the stables where he had already set up the horses and carriage. Before we left I once again offered Aristophanes the money which I insisted he take and he gave me a peck on the cheek. He then proceeded to hug Romeo for a little too long. Aamlthea then came from the inn and gave us some lunches wrapped in some cloth "they're for the journey my lovelies we'll miss you. Hope to see you both again sometime". "We'll miss you both terribly sweethearts" said Aristophanes a tear rolling down his cheek. "Bye thanks for the hospitality and the lunches" I said and as the carriage pulled away from the Richard III inn we waved farewell to its two peculiar owners. On the long journey from the inn to London I fell asleep when I awoke it was twilight and I could see the great city of London not too far in the distance. "We're nearly there my love" I shouted. "We will be married on Sunday at Saint Dunstan's, noon".

Chapter Three: No place like London

When we arrived in London it was already dark, the warm glow of the gas street lights was the only thing preventing us from being in complete and total darkness. The first thing we needed to do was to find a place to stay, we visited several grand hotels but all were too big and fancy for my liking so we eventually settled on The Ritz which in comparison was fairly quaint. We were of course given the honeymoon suite which had very modest décor with its Chrystal chandelier, polished oak furniture and Egyptian cotton bed sheets. The bathroom was even worse with a huge marble bath tub and solid gold toilet seat. "I don't think I can stay here long my love" I said to Rome "It's far too common" "don't worry sweetie it's only for the time being and then we'll set sail for New York and the new world" he replied. I decided that if it was only for a short time then I could put up with it. I told Romeo that I would go to Saint Dunstan's in the morning to book it for the wedding. We then fell to sleep in each other's arms.

For my visit to the church I wore a very modest grey dress showing next to no cleavage and yet I still looked sexy as hell or at least that's what Romeo told me. On my to the church I stopped at a very nice little pie shop "Mrs L's" the pie I had was wonderful the meat was so succulent and juicy; if I was fat I may have said screw the wedding and stayed at the pie shop all day but no onto the church. When I arrived at the church I discovered to my surprise that the door was locked "excuse me" I said to a rather grim looking judge who happened to be passing by "but do you know if the reverend is around anywhere? I need to ask him a question?" "what dear?, no not the reverend but I do know that friar Laurence is at "Mr T's Parlour" having a tooth pulled". I couldn't believe what I had just been told, friar Laurence here in London it had to be a coincidence.

Sadly for me it wasn't a coincidence the friar was in town, when I entered the parlour an expression of shock crossed his fat bearded face. "Ariadne my child how the devil are you?" I felt sick Laurence was the old fool who had married Romeo and Juliet in Verona; he was simply a pawn in my plot to get rid of that despicable harpy and not someone I wished to see again, I had no choice but to dispose of him he couldn't know that Romeo was alive. How would I kill him? I had no idea what I could do I was a good person and I couldn't hurt a fly. "OH MY GO friar Laurence I can't believe you here in London, I was hoping someone would show me around Saint Dunstan's" " Of course I will my child just let Mr T pull this tooth and I'll be right with you. By the look on Mr T's face he wasn't too pleased to have me watching the tooth pulling I wondered what his problem was.

After we left Mr T's the friar showed me around the church it certainly was perfect I asked if I could use it for the wedding on Sunday and he said yes for a small fee of one hundred pounds. I handed over the money and then asked Laurence if he would mind showing me the catacombs, I had plan for getting him out of the picture. He obliged and took a torch from one of the sconces on the wall and showed me the way. It was dark and there were a lot of cobwebs, the wooden steps were covered with a thick layer of dust, the catacombs seemed like the perfect place for that moron of a friar to meet his demise. When we reached the bottom of the stairs we came to a small oak door it was covered in dust just like the steps, Laurence took a large iron key from his pocket and unlocked it. When we were both in I slammed the door shut "what are you doing my child?" he asked "I thought we would have a little drink in celebration" "celebration of what?" "oh just our reunion" I replied. I took out two small bottles from my dress pockets and passed one of them to him. "Thank you my child" he said and took a gulp from the bottle. I began to cackle at his foolishness, he looked shocked "what's so funny my child?" I didn't answer the question. While he stood looking puzzled I grabbed the torch from his hands, I then thrust it into his face. He screamed in agony, I kept on thrusting the torch at his body, luckily his robes eventually caught fire and he began to run around the room. He ran and ran all the time still ablaze it was a morbidly comical thing to see I really couldn't help but laugh. After about fifteen minutes of burning, running and screaming he finally ran into a wall, good, at last he was dead. I left the catacombs and locked the door behind me. I decided I would throw the key into the sewer no one would find friar Laurence anytime soon and when they did I would be happily living in New York with my handsome hunk Romeo.

After all the excitement of this morning I decided to go shopping for the wedding, I knew that I wanted it to be as lavish as possible so I decided to go to Harrods. Harrods was a beautiful shop with its many Egyptian themed areas and its beautifully set out products, all were too expensive for any normal person but I was far from being a normal person I was amazing. This place was truly heaven for any materialistic person. First of all I went into the magnificent clothing department where I loaded my shopping cart with dozens of expensive fur coats; mink, fox, otter, beaver, rabbit and grey wolf just to name a few. I then proceeded to the wedding dress section and looked through what they had to offer. None of the dresses caught my eye I was about to give up when...there it was the most beautiful gown I had ever seen. It was a long white (because I am a Virgin) dress with lots of pink ruffles, the top part was corseted and was tied with silky pink ribbon, the skirt had pink bows all over it. It came with a beautiful veil which was covered in delicate silk roses; it would attach perfectly to one my diadems. I knew this was the dress for me; I got so overwhelmed by its beauty that I began to cry. I plonked it into the cart without even trying it on. I knew it would fit. I also grabbed a few other dresses and put them in the cart too. I then moved onto the jewellery section of the store it was even more impressive than the dress section. I was surrounded by all my dreams; diamonds, rubies, emeralds, pearls, gold, silver, platinum, tin, tiaras, crowns, diadems, bracelets, necklaces, earrings, belly bars, rings and even some ornate jewellery boxes, none however were big enough for my collection, I would need a chest. I put all the jewellery could into the cart and went to look at the china and cutlery. After that I went to pay. My shopping came to the grand total of £105,456,387 which was a little much. "Oh don't worry about paying" said the cashier "You seem like such a nice person and it's your wedding I'll pay" I wasn't complaining so I let him pay.

I returned to the hotel room exhausted by the day's events. I slumped into a chair. "You look tired, what have you been up to?" asked Romeo "Oh I booked the church, went shopping and killed Friar Laurence" I replied "That's nice dear I hope you didn't spend too much on the wedding" "don't worry the cashier at Harrods paid for the whole damn thing, I hope you don't mind? I invited him to the wedding".


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Four: (Not) Getting Married Today

It was finally Sunday the day of my wedding. I sat in the hotel room contemplating the day ahead when the phone rang; I picked it up and was told that my best friend and maid of honour had finally arrived all the way from Venice, Italy. I rushed downstairs and into the lobby "Desdemona" I said and she turned around "OMG Ariadne I like totally cannot believe my eyes you look so much hotter than the last time I saw you beyotch" "nice to see you too Mona" I replied we kissed each other on the cheek. "So where is this babalicious hunk of yours, Romeo? That's his name right?" "Yes his name is Romeo and he is getting ready at the church. He can't see me in my dress before the wedding now can he?" I replied. "Oh btw Ari I have a surprise for you" and with that Desdemona produced her hand on it was the biggest rock I'd ever seen "OH MY GOD!" I screamed in surprise "you're engaged. Who's the lucky fella?" "He should be coming now" said Desdemona turning to see where her fiancé was. A few seconds later a rather tall and devastatingly handsome Moorish general in full Venetian military regalia strode into the hotel lobby followed by a short and thin sinister looking man. "This is like totally Othello my fiancé and the other man is like Iago, Othello's ensign and friend. "Nice to meet you both" I said offering a hand to the two men which they in turn shook. "So tell us how you like bagged Romeo" Desdemona said "last I heard he was with that Juliet" "please don't remind me of that manipulative cow" I said "I'd rather not talk about her and her manipulative ways" "that's one thing I cannot stand" said Iago "manipulative people" and with that we all went and sat down and had a nice cup of tea.

We arrived at Saint Dunstan's at one o'clock. It was a perfect day for a wedding the cherry trees were covered in blossoms, birds were singing, the sun burned with the passion of a thousand fireflies and the mayor of London had even allowed the church to be painted pink just for my wedding. It was a dream come true, as I walked into the church everyone in the crowd was looking at me in my beautiful wedding gown. I could only imagine the immense sense of pride the must have felt for my wedding wasn't only a great day for me but a great day for England. It would surely be considered a national holiday. When I entered the church with its high rafters and beautiful stained glass windows a number of young men trumpeted a fanfare for me. It was a time of ecstasy for me I was surrounded by family and friends, in the crowd of familiar faces I noticed my old high school friends Sebastian and Viola, even Aristophanes and Amalthea were there, they both waved a friendly greeting to me but for some reason Aristophanes seemed a little shifty and worried. I walked down the aisle expecting to see Romeo standing at the altar but he wasn't there I was shocked where was he? "Excuse me reverend but have you seen Romeo? He was supposed to be here before me" "no dear I'm a little worried too, I think he may have been kidnapped" the crowd seated on the pews broke into a gossipy chatter. "OH MY GOD! WHERE IS HE!" I shouted "WHERE IS HE!"

"I know where he is" it was Amalthea. A gasp of shock came from the crowed. "What do you mean Amalthea?" I asked "it's Aristophanes he's a homosexual, he's kidnapped Romeo. He left me this letter" she passed me the letter and I began to read it:

Dear Ariadne

I have taken Romeo as I am madly in love with him as I am a homosexual. I know what I have done is wrong darhling but I had no choice I couldn't bear to see him married to a woman. I have taken him to the catacombs of this church. I am going to kill Romeo and myself. If I can't have him no one can.

Yours sincerely, Aristophanes.

I was shocked beyond belief that bastard had taken my reason for being I would have to save Romeo. So still dressed in my wedding dress I grabbed a torch and began to run down those old and dusty steps to the catacombs. How had Aristophanes even opened the door I had thrown the key into the sewer? When I reached the bottom I notice that the door was off its hinges. I walked into the dark room, passed Friar Laurence's charred remains and walked deeper into the darkness.

I walked for what seemed like an eternity as I got deeper I notice more and more human remains scattered on the floor one of the skeletons was covered in expensive jewellery. I decided to help myself to it she didn't need it anymore after all, I shoved the trinkets into my pockets they would make a nice addition to my collection. After my little "shopping spree" I returned to my search for Romeo. After about an hour of searching I eventually gave up and fell to my knees weeping "damn it" I said to myself. It was then that heard the voices "kiss me darhling, please, your too divine to kill" it was Aristophanes. I followed his voice it was getting louder and louder, I was getting close. I finally reached them, Romeo was tied to some kind of bizarre altar; there were candles all around hundreds of them. Aristophanes was there leaning of Romeo totally naked, it really wasn't something I wanted to see his body was far from sexy and he was really hairy a bit like a bear, I felt sick. "Kiss me, kiss me KISS ME!" Aristophanes shouted "I will never kiss you, you FIEND!" screamed Romeo. "hahahahaha then you will...DIE!" Aristophanes was clearly unhinged I had to stop him. I watched as he moved over to a table I at first hadn't noticed, from it he took a large gem encrusted dagger. He moved back over to Romeo and was about to plunge the dagger into him when without thinking I screamed "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM HIM YOU BASTARD" I was a woman possessed I lunged at Aristophanes with all the power of an angry grizzly. Surprised Aristophanes dropped the dagger harmlessly onto Romeo chest; he went down with a thud as I tackled him. I began to violently punch him "you bastard how dare you" I had beaten him within an inch of his life. Romeo awoke and noticed the dagger "is this a dagger which I see before me" he said "pass it to me!" I shouted. I took the dagger and was about to end Aristophanes' pitiful life when he weakly said "no...no...no please don't do...it" "what reason have you given me not to?" I asked angrily. He gave no reply I knew it had to be done so I slid the dagger into his chest and with his final breath all he said was "breke...kekex...koa...x" that was it he was finally dead.

I ran over to Romeo and helped him to stand up "are you all right my love?" I asked him he told me he was and we kissed passionately "thank you for saving me sweetie, I would be toast if not for your quick timing" "no sweat Romeo all in a day's work" I said. We were about to leave the room when we heard a blood curdling scream, we turned to see...Amalthea "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE! You foul demons you've killed my beloved" "I had to" I said "he was a depraved homosexual he could have raped or killed Romeo" "go...go...GOOOOO! She screamed at us. We took this as our que to leave. "BY ZEUS I SHALL HAVE MY REVENGE!" She screamed as we were leaving. We decided it was pointless to go back to the wedding ceremony as everyone had already left. "I think we need to get out of dodge" said Romeo "I have a friend in demark he lives in a beautiful castle, Elisinore, we should go there, king Claudius may even let us get married in the grounds" and so we returned to the hotel and packed.

The next morning we said goodbye to London and headed to Plymouth where we would take a ship to Calais and from there we would make our way to Denmark. "Since we will be in France Romeo could we please visit Paris? You know before we go to Denmark?" I queried "Yes sweetie anything for you, after what you did for me... no, us, I would take you anywhere" "you know Romeo I love you" and with that he kissed me.


	3. Chapter 3

_Author's notes: Zis Chapter was fun to write ze whole z thing was quite a challenge. Hope anyone reading enjoy the chapter. ^_^ _

Chapter Five: Ah! Paris! (Paree)

New York has neon, Berlin has bars, but ah! Paris! (Paree) ze city of brozerely love I was finally zere. It had always been a dream of mine to return to zis wonderful city after spending my childhood here. In my heart I would always be a Parisian (Pareesian). zis city had so much going for it; ze food, ze atmosphere, ze smoking, ze sound of ze accordion, la sex and of course La Tour Eiffel. "Romeo My love why don't we get married in ze Notre Dame de Paris (Paree)?" I asked "of course my sweetie but first I will take you to ze Opera house I ere zey are performing "Il Mutto" and ze famous soprano La Carlotta is zinging ze part of the ze lead". Oh I was so excited I had always wanted to go to ze opera but zen I realised with horror zat I had nozing to wear "Romeo give me your platinum card" I ordered "I need to go shopping" he chuckled and handed over his leather wallet.

Ze first place I went was Chanel I needed a new dress and Coco was a personal friend of mine. I entered ze magnificent boutique "take me to Coco" I demanded to a snooty looking woman wiz her grey hair tied tightly in to a bun "ov corz Madame" she said "ooo exactly am I introducing?" she asked "just tell her it's an old friend" she opened ze door to Coco's office "an old friend" she said. I entered the office, it was beautifully decorated and mannequins wiz half-finished clothes were dotted about ze room "allo zere Coco, old friend" I said in a warm voice "oh ma gode" she said "Ariadne aw are yu" we both kissed each ozers cheeks and she told me to sit down. I asked her if she would make me a dress for ze opera and she asked "aw long do ay ave to make it?" "I need it for tonight" I told her. Wiz zat and saying nozing she got up and marched out of ze room slamming ze door shut behind her. I waited for five minutes and was about to leave when ze door opened and Coco strode in wiz the most extravagant Avant garde dress I had ever seen, it was a blue dress that went down to ze floor it had a split up ze side of ze skirt so I could show off my beautiful legs. Ze collar was made wiz pink ostrich plumes zere were also some plumes around the sleeves, it was very low cut but in a classy way at both ze back and ze front "I zink you will also like zis polere bear fur wrap as well" Coco said "oh Coco you are a life saver, zank you so very much" she told me she would have zem delivered to my hotel and we said goodbye. Now all I needed to do was to go and find some shoes.

I entered the Salle de Chaussures and was surrounded by so many shoes zat I didn't know what to do with myself. I grabbed all ze shoes I liked and zrew zem into my basket zere where; pumps, flats, mules, boots, sneakers, sling backs, moccasins, sandals, clogs and slippers. I was in heaven. It was zen zat I saw them….ze most perfect pair of Manolo Blahniks' zey were amazing. I needed zose shoes my life depended on it, I ran over to zem and grabbed zem. To my surprise zey were attached to somezing or should I say someone, she was an ingénue zat was for sure. "Sorry but zese are my shoes" I screeched "Non, ils sont mes chaussures" she replied is some sort of unintelligible gibberish. We started to fight over who would get ze shoes but as my upper body strength was amazing I got the upper hand. Ze French girl went crashing into one of ze display cases causing shoes to scatter across the room; pumps, flats, mules, boots, sneakers, sling backs, moccasins, sandals, clogs and slippers were everywhere. I got up and was walking toward the checkout victorious when a young and very angry Frenchman ran up to me and said "comment osez vous attaquer ma Cosette épouse" it was the same unintelligible gibberish zat ze woman had used. I laughed and pushed past. Shoe shopping sure made you hungry.

For lunch I went to a delightful little patisserie; ze window display was filled with ze most delicate looking cakes and pastries. I started to drool at even ze zought of eating them, what should I have? I went in and sat at a table and was warmly greeted by a happy looking waitress. "Wat would Madame like to eet?" she asked "I'll try one of everything, please" I said "oui Madame"and wiz zat she toddled off to ze kitchen. She had been gone for what seemed like forever, when I suddenly smelled something burning. I got up from my chair and walked cautiously over to ze kitchen door and pushed it open and walked inside. ze waitress had gone "hello" I said "anybody zere?" but no, no one was zere. Zen I noticed the source of burning smell it was ze oven. I walked over to it and turned it off. I zought it best to leave whatever had burnt in zere, I turned and was about to leave when curiosity got ze better of me. I moved back over to ze oven and slowly opend ze door "oh damn ze ditzy bitch has burnt the honey roast ham" I said to no one. I was about to leave when it dawned on me, zis was a patisserie zey sold cakes not ham. What could it be though if not a ham? I decided to have a look. I picked up a pair of cheery floral oven gloves and placed zem on my milky smooth hands. I zen proceeded to lift out ze baking tray, when I saw what was on ze tray I zrew it as far away from me as I could, it was…ze waitress or at least her head. I fell to my knees and began to weep. I was terrified someone had done zis to scare me. If I had worked here it may have been my head on ze baking tray. What was I to do? I sat on ze floor and sobbed for about ten minutes, when I finally gained my composure I got up and zen I notice it, on top of the stove zere was a letter. I picked it up and read it aloud "your next" it said. I felt sick, sick zat anyone could even zink of doing something zis horrible to me; I was after all loved by everyone around me.

I returned to ze hotel in a state of shock. I told Romeo what had happened "don't worry dear I'll protect you" to reassure me he wrapped his strong muscular arms around me, we embraced for what seemed like a life time, zen he frenched me in a way I had never been frenched before. I loved him and he loved me, we were perfect togezer. After our passionate frenching session we went down to ze hotel restaurant, I ordered ze honey roast ham and Romeo had ze lobster. "Ze smell of zat waitresses chard head certainly made me crave ham" I told Romeo "I can imagine" he said in reply. Before ze waiter brought our food he came over and gave us a bottle of champagne "zis is a bottle of "Dom Perignon White Gold Jeroboam " it would usually cost around $40,000 but yu can av eet on ze ause" We zanked him and he brought us our food. After we were finished I offered ze waiter a hefty tip of two francs but he refused and told us it had been his pleasure to serve us. After zat we went on to ze Paris (Paree) opera house, where we were in for a night of melodrama.

Ze opera was pretty uneventful we were sat in one of ze boxes. Ze sets were very grand and elaborate, ze costumes were well made and fitting for ze time zat ze opera was set. We were listening to La Carlotta screech out some over ze top aria when suddenly she croaked just like a frog; a wave of whispers came from ze crowd. Carlotta cleared her zroat and attempted to sing again but it was no good she just croaked again. She looked embarrassed and just stared at ze audience for a second; she zen began to cry and ran off ze stage. "Don't worry" said some old man "zis is just a technical hitch, ze opera will resume, miss Daae will play ze lead but for now please enjoy ze ballet". We sat and watched ze rather dull and clumsy ballet, I scanned the ze crowd with my solid gold opera binoculars and saw zat ze little slut from ze Salle de Chaussures was sat in ze front row. How I hated that little bitch, she reminded me so much of Juliet I would love to see ze cow get flatted by ze opera house chandelier. Just then my dream came true; ze chandelier fell from its place above ze audinence and took out the entire first three rows. People began to scream and run out of ze opera. "Oh come on Romeo" I had had enough "let's get out of here zis is far too melodramatic for my taste, what? Are we in some sort of bad musical?" we got up and left.

When we got back to ze hotel I collapsed on my bed exhausted. Romeo and I fell asleep in each other's arms. After some amount of sleep I was awakened by a strange glow in ze corner of ze room it was ze waitress from ze patisserie. "Something is rotten in ze state of Denmark" she said "and you are ze only one who can help, you are ze chosen one" I wasn't scared "I will go zere at once" I told her. I woke Romeo up and told him of ze apparition's visitation "we must go now to Elsinore now ze ghost told me to" I told him "Okay zen my sweetie let's get going". I was glad to be leaving Paris (Paree) it was a shit pit of a town anyhow. "THE, THERE, THEY, THIS, THEM, THINK" I shouted to the heavens.


	4. Chapter 4

_Authors Notes: Hi new chapter, in this one something terrible happens to Ariadne…her wardrobe gets ruined _

Chapter Six: A Weekend in the Country (of Denmark)

The ghost had been right something was rotten in the state of Denmark; it was my luggage. Somehow on the ship to Copenhagen salt water had gotten into my suit cases and ruined my all clothes. All I had to wear on our journey to Elsinore castle was my finest white mink coat, my beautiful teal, chiffon cocktail dress with the golden embroidered ivy leaves all over it. Luckily the Manolo Blahniks' that I bought in Paris (Paree) were also safe but all my other clothes and shoes were now mouldy and rotten. I was devastated my entire expensive wardrobe was gone, how could I live without them. I was lost in a world of dread and terror I didn't even notice when we had arrived at Elsinore that the carriage had stopped. "Sweetie were here" said Romeo "I feel like throwing myself into a lake and ending it all" I said to Romeo "come now sweetie, what would I do if you drowned yourself?" He asked "find a woman who has nice things" I replied dryly. He kissed me "you know I could never replace you Ariadne, any way I'm sure Queen Gertrude will have something you can wear" her reassured me. I felt a lot happier now I was sure the Queen would have good taste. We got out of the carriage and were greeted by some guards; they took us into the castle and showed us into the throne room "Romeo and Ariadne" one of the guards announced. The King and Queen rose from their seats and bowed to us "an honour to meet you" said King Claudius kissing my hand. The Queen came over to me and looked me up and down "you truly are a beauty aren't you" she said. "Your majesty's" said Romeo "is my good friend Prince Hamlet around?" "Oh no, my dear son has gone completely mad" said Gertrude "Yes it's so sad" said Claudius "We've sent him to England with some school friends to recover" "That's such a shame, I was hoping to see him" said Romeo. This subject seemed like something that the royal couple didn't want to discuss so Romeo left it at that. "Oh Queen Gertrude I have been meaning to ask…" I explained about my clothes "Oh well this is a stroke of luck" said the Queen "a young maiden of the court, Ophelia has recently drowned herself in the lake so you can have her clothes she was your size too." I was very happy to hear this I now had a new wardrobe I just hoped that this Ophelia had had good taste "Thank you your majesty" I said "no problem, let's leave the men to get to know each other, I'll take you to Ophelia's room, Oh and please call me Trudy" said the queen. We left Romeo and Claudius downstairs to discuss hunting and Trudy escorted me to Ophelia's room.

Ophelia's room was very luxurious with its large four poster bed, the sheets were pure satin and had lavish gold embroidered embellishments on the. There were four large and very comfortable looking pillow, they seemed a little much for one person. The other furniture of the room was equally grand a huge dresser seemed to take up one side of the room; a beautiful vanity table with an assortment of perfumes, makeups and brushes was at the other side. The walls of the room were covered in lots of expensive fine art and attached to one wall was a stunning mirror with a gold leaf frame. This room was how I had always dreamed my bedroom would look, I felt rather jealous of Ophelia, ha I thought to myself, you're jealous of a dead woman. "Stunning isn't it" said Gertrude in her dusky contralto, "I'll where her clothes are kept" I walked over to the huge dresser "on no dear" said the Queen "that's where she kept her hats, her dresses are over here" she walked me over to a heavy looking wooden door "go on then open it" she said. I grasped the iron handle of the door, twisted it and pulled it open and walked in side. I was nearly blinded by the beauty of what I saw. I was surrounded, surrounded by thousands of the most beautiful dresses; silk, chiffon, satin, cotton and wool to name just a few of the materials used, Varsace, Chanel, Christian Dior, Dolce and Gabbana, Vivian Westwood and Gap to name just a few of the labels. The room was cavernous and everywhere I looked there was a dress more glamorous that the next. "Why don't you try this on" said Gertrude handing me a gorgeous white sundress. I went behind the changing screen and removed the clothe I was wearing and slipped into the sundress. "Come take a looked in the mirror" Said Gertrude. I looked into the glass of the mirror and what I saw was a radiant princess, I began to cry I had always seen myself as ugly but the woman in the mirror was gorgeous. "You know you look just like her" said Gertrude "come sit at the vanity table and I'll brush you hair". I sat at the vanity table as she had asked; she picked up a silver hair brush and began to brush my long golden tresses. "She would ask me to do this every night" said the Queen "she would say "come on Trudy come and brush my hair" and she would sit here while I brushed her hair". I felt a little awkward sat here with the queen bushing my hair; she eventually stopped and perched on the next to me on the little stool I was sat on. "You know I miss her so much" she said placing a hand onto my knee, now I felt really uncomfortable, she then stared into my eyes "there like burning sapphires, just like Ophelia's" she said and then she kissed me. Now I was shocked, she pulled at the dress eventually ripping it to reveal my milk white breasts. She stopped kissing and looked down at my heaving bosom, she was about to touch them when I slapped her across the face, she fell to the floor in a heap. I quickly covered myself up and then helped her off the floor "I'm so sorry your majesty I was just shocked by what you did" I told her "no it's my fault child I shouldn't have forced myself on you, Ophelia may have loved my but you aren't her and I shouldn't have tried to replace her with you. I'm so sorry. As an apology please take Ophelia's wardrobe and please dear don't tell the king I about this" "I wouldn't dream of telling him your majesty" I reassured her. She told me that she was going for a rest and that dinner would be ready at six and hastily left the room.

I arrived downstairs to find that only Romeo and Claudius were in the dining room "where's Queen Gertrude?" I asked "I'm afraid my wife has a headache and won't be dining with us tonight" said the King, this didn't surprise me. After what had happened in Ophelia's bedroom I didn't think I would be seeing much of the Queen this weekend. "So what have you two boys been up to this afternoon?" I asked "I showed Romeo my hunting equipment and we shot some clay pigeons" replied the King. "Then we discussed plans for the wedding this weekend. Ariadne, the King has kindly let us use the palace grounds" said Romeo excitedly "thank you so much" I said to the king and I curtsied. "Oh no problem, after Ophelia's death Trudy and I have been looking for something to celebrate" Replied the King. Just then an army of waiter marched into the dining room, they had brought several large silver platters all covered with different foods; chicken wings, hot dogs, finger sandwiches, salad leaves, BBQ spare ribs and salmon were just a of the types of food there was on offer. "I hope you don't mind, I had the chef make a buffet instead of a more formal meal, I hope you don't mind, it's just that I didn't really know what you would like" said Claudius "Oh it's more than enough for us" Romeo said "yes thank you so much" I added. We all sat and ate the filling meal and discussed the plans for the wedding which had all been taken care of by the King, he had even asked his chef to cater and the chef had kindly agreed to make the wedding cake. I was so happy I would finally be married to my beloved Romeo. I kissed the king on his cheek for his hospitality and kindness and he blushed slightly "you know my dear you really are a vision" he told me. I felt a little uncomfortable, his statement reminded me too much of this afternoons events with the Queen, I really didn't need any more unwanted advances.

After dinner the King asked one of his servants to show us to our room. When we were finally alone I told Romeo about the Queens attempted seduction "did you know Queen Gertrude is a lesbian, or at least bi. She kissed me in Ophelia's room; she also implied that she had been having an affair with Ophelia before her death. And now the King tells me I'm a "vision" I'm so sick of all this unwanted attention why am I so damn alluring?" "Well I certainly don't blame them you are damn sexy and you're a really nice person too" Romeo told me. I gave a deep and frustrated sigh and hugged him "you know you really make me feel better Romeo, I love you so much" we then kissed passionately; his tongue was like the proboscis of a butterfly trying to find the sweet nectar in my mouth. I really burned for him I needed him inside me but no not now, I wasn't going to be a cheap tart and sleep with him before the wedding. Anyway I didn't have long to wait in two days we would be able to make love until death finally parts us. That night I slept well Dreaming of wedding and new clothe and making sweet love to my handsome Romeo. How I couldn't wait for it all.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Seven: Marry Well

It was Sunday again; I awoke to find a letter on the satin pillow next to me. The letter looked very important; I tore open the envelope and read its contents. When I finished the letter I couldn't believe what I had just read; I reread it to see if in my state of tiredness I had misread it. Sadly I hadn't misread it at all. A sudden painful wave of grief struck me; I began to cry uncontrollably, I sobbed and sobbed into my delicate pillow. Queen Gertrude who had happened to be passing my room heard my mournful sobbing and came in. "What the heavens is the matter my dear?" she asked, I said nothing and just kept on crying, I was hysterical and so Gertrude did the only thing she could, she slapped me. I abruptly stopped my weeping and calmed down. "I'm sorry about that I had to you were hysterical, now what is the matter? Please tell me" she said "she's dead" I said "who dear, Ophelia?" asked the Queen "No, my good friend….Desdemona. I got this letter it's say that her husband Othello suffocated her. They had just eloped and were in Cyprus and he murdered her" I told the lustful Queen who was now leering at my cleavage. "I'm so sorry for you loss" she said in consolation. "I just can't believe this has happened; why do these things always happen to me?" I asked. "Whatever do you mean?" asked the Queen "well now Desdemona has gone and gotten herself murdered I have no maid of honour. Couldn't Othello have waited till after my wedding to kill Mona? Now my wedding is ruined" I told her. I began to sob again. "Well I could be your maid of honour if you'd like" said Gertrude "really you would do that for me your such a nice person" I gave her a peck on the cheek for her kindness, she blushed slightly. Once again I was in a good mood; I could have my dream wedding and with no hitches.

The wedding started at one o'clock in the castle courtyard. Claudius and Gertrude had spared no expense to make this the most beautiful event Elsinore had ever seen. There was a champagne fountain filled with the most expensive champagne from France, Top Michelin chefs flown all the way from Kyoto and a crowd filled with royalty, nobility and celebrities from all over the world. It was truly one spectacular event. The guests were seated and the New York Philharmonic orchestra began to play a rather beautifully orchestrated and grand version of "Here comes the Bride" it was in a word sublime. I walked down the aisle toward my handsome Romeo who was actually there this time, as I walked I notice that people seemed to be awe struck by fabulous Vera Wang wedding dress with its delicate lace patterns of flowers and song birds. I eventually came to a stop next to Romeo; The Reverend hushed the crowd and started the service. "We are gathered here today to witness the marriage of Romeo Montague and Ariadne, would you like to say your vows Romeo?" he said, Romeo cleared his throat and began to speak "For all of my life I have waited to meet the woman of my dreams and clearly that woman is you Ariadne. I have never been happier than I am now and I vow to always love you and cherish you and protect you from harm. I here today devote my life to you." He said, what saccharine tripe I thought to myself. "Now your vows please Ariadne" said the Reverend. I looked into Romeo's puppy dog eyes "You Romeo are one of the bravest men I have ever met; you have always been there for me and I know you will always protect me from all of our foe and I know that if I was not here you would have nothing to live for, in other words , you're welcome." I said to him. "I now proclaim you woman and husband, you may kiss the bride" said the reverend. With that Romeo grabbed me and forced his lips onto mine and thrust his slimy tongue down my sweet throat. The crowd cheered as we walked hand in hand down the aisle, when we walked out of castle Chapel we were showered by a heavy rainfall of perfect, red rose petals, I was so happy I began to cry.

The party after the wedding was amazing; there was a mountain of presents to rival Olympus Mons. I was so thrilled to have so many people show such an interest the future of Romeo and me. I really wanted to open the presents now "can I open them now Romeo or at least just one of them? Please" I begged my husband. "Go on then sweetie" he said. I really didn't know which present to unwrap; I looked and looked around the huge pile and eventually saw on I deemed worthy, it was a beautifully wrapped gift; the paper was covered in gold leaf and it had been tied with a silver ribbon. I eagerly ripped the wrapping paper with my teeth, pulling the ribbon off in the process; I tossed them both to the side. "What is it" asked Romeo. I opened up the outer wooden box to reveal…..a coupon that said the giver of the gift would place a donation of £1000 to the charity of my choice. I must say I was less than impressed in fact I was outraged. "Who the hell got me this?" I screamed at the crowd, my "friend" from high school Viola stumbled out of the mass of people "I….I….d-did" she said timidly. I glared at her with a look that would have killed an elephant "YOU STUPID LITTLE WHORE!" I screamed at her "YOU LITTLE BITCH, I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU WOULD MAKE THIS DAY, MY DAY ABOUT CHARITY!" I slapped her sallow face, oh how she reminded me of that little Delilah, Juliet. I called for one of the guard to have her and her pathetic brother Sebastian thrown for the wedding and shipped off to whatever hole they came from. After that unpleasantness it was time for the toasts. The first person to toast me and Romeo was Gertrude my Maid of honour. "I am so happy to have Romeo and Ariadne get married here; I have known them for only a week and they already feel like children to me. I look forward to this very day in future years to come when we will be celebrating their anniversary. To Romeo! To Ariadne!" Said the slightly tipsy Queen. Everyone took a sip form their glasses. I ignored the rest of the toasts as they were much less interesting that Gertrude's. All I wanted now was to cut the cake and then consummate the marriage.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Eight: Losing My Mind

A bright and very intense bright white light awoke me from my peaceful slumber. When I opened my eyes I was shocked to find that I was in a room that was completely unfamiliar to me. This was not Elsinore castle at all; this was somewhere completely different. Gone where that lavish pieces of furniture; the expensive paintings and ornaments that adored the rooms, the high ceilings and stone floors; these where all replaced by white. Everything was white; the walls, the door, even the colourful silk bed sheets had been replaced by plain white cotton ones. I then noticed that I was completely alone, Romeo was nowhere to be seen. I felt so lost. I got out of bed and ran over to the door; I grasped the cold steel handle and turned it. It was no use the door was locked. I suddenly felt an overwhelming sense of dread; where was I? I started to hammer on the door with my fists "HELP! PLEASE HELP ME!" I shouted as loudly as possible; but it was to no avail, no one came. I slumped onto the floor and began to cry.

I sat there at the foot of the door crying for what seemed like hours. I had given up all hope of being rescued when suddenly I heard the rattling of a key at the other side of the door. Someone had finally come to save me I thought but then it dawned on me that this "saviour" could in fact be the one who had locked me in the room. Fearing for my safety I ran to the other side of the room and concealed myself beneath the bed. The door swung open; my heart began to pound. I heard the clicking of heels walking into the room "Miss Collins, where are you?" asked an unfamiliar female voice. The unknown woman walked over to the bed; her feet were very close to my face. "Miss Collins I know you're under there; please come out I need you to get washed and dressed. I'll have to get Dr Stone if you don't come out now." Said the woman. I swallowed loudly and slowly crawled from under the bed; I was greeted by a very pleasant smiling woman in a nurse's uniform. "Who the hell are you and where the hell am I?" I barked at the woman. She looked into my eyes "You really don't remember do you" she said "Come on follow me and we'll get you showered; everything will be revealed in time" she grabbed me gently by the arm and guided me out of the room.

She led me down a long gloomy hallway; we passed many doors on the way. The woman told me she was called Joan and that she was a nurse here but she still didn't reveal where we were. Along the hallway we passed many other nurses all were solemn and passed us without even a hint of acknowledgement. Joan and I finally came to a halt by a door with a frosted glass window "there you go Miss Collins you can have a shower here; if you want I can help you but you're free to go by yourself" she said "thank you but I think I can shower myself and please stop calling me Miss Collins name is Ariadne" I told. She just looked at me and we both stood there for a moment; she coughed, handed me a towel and gestured to the door. I walked in. The room was large and damp, it smelled mouldy. There were three rows of showers at one side of the room; at the other side there was a row of sinks all had a mirror above it. I took off the soft cotton nightgown I was wearing and walked over to the showers; I turned one of them on and stepped under the spray of hot water. It felt good to have a shower, it was the only normal thing I had done since I woke up. I stayed under the shower for a long time just hoping it would wash me back into Romeo's arms, sadly it didn't. I turned off the shower after I realised that I couldn't stay there for ever. I dried myself with the soft dry towel Nurse Joan had given me and I then walked over to the mirror. I wiped away the thick layer of condensation and looked at my reflection. At first I didn't quite understand what I was looking at so I wiped away more condensation. I then realised that it couldn't be a mirror; the refection I saw was not my own but that of an old woman. Her face was covered in deep wrinkles and her hair was tangled mass of dirty grey. I waved my hand and she simultaneously waved back; I moved my head she did the same. What was happening? I looked down at my hands and was horrified to see that they like the woman's face were wrinkled. I screamed for Joan and she ran into the room "whatever is the matter Miss Collins?" she asked. I pointed at the woman and asked "who's that woman?" she just looked at me as if the question was insane. It dawned on me that the question was insane I knew who it was in the mirror I just didn't want to admit it. "Lord…lord…..LORD!" I shouted "that woman is me." I collapsed to the floor and began to cry. How could I be such a hideous or hag? What had happened to my beautiful golden locks and my smooth alabaster skin? And where the hell was I?

Joan helped me off the floor and got me dressed. She walked me back down the corridor and took me to the cafeteria for some breakfast. We entered the room; it was warm and I could smell the delicious aroma of bacon and eggs being cooked, it reminded me of the time me and Romeo had stayed in "The Richard III" and Amalthea had cooked for us. That was such a long time ago now. Joan walked me towards a table we passed many other women; all of them seemed odd like they were form another time. One woman I recognised but I couldn't put a name to her face; she was sat with another woman whose face was covered with thick white makeup. The first woman looked up at me and with a much exaggerated arm gesture told me she was called Norma; she asked me to come sit with her and her heavily over painted friend but Joan told her she would have to talk to me some other time. "You can make friends after seeing Dr Stone" said Joan. She went to the counter and got us some food; I didn't really feel hungry so I just picked at it with my fork. After breakfast Joan ushered my to Dr Stones office; she told me to sit on a chair by the door and wait for a while. Joan knocked on the door and entered leaving me all alone. I started to cry, what was happening to me?

After about ten minutes Joan came out of the doctor's office "You can go in now Miss Collins and don't worry Dr Stone is very good" she reassured me. I got up from the chair and hesitantly walked into Dr Stone's office. I was greeted by the warm and friendly Dr Stone "hello Miss Collins, please have a seat" he said gesturing to a comfy looking arm chair. He was a very handsome man, mid-forties I guessed, he still had dark hair but there was a hint of grey here and there. I walked over to the arm chair and sat down on it; the doctor took a chair opposite to it. He looked at me with an intensity that reminded me of Romeo. "So you know why you're here don't you Miss Collins?" he asked "well actually I haven't got a clue where here is let alone why I am here? And please call me Ariadne that my name not Miss Collins" I replied "I know for a fact that your name is Alexis Collins. Now as for where you are this is "The Frances Famer institute for mentally ill female celebrities, Los Angeles, California" as for why you are here that a rather complicated story. I'm not sure I should tell you anything while you appear to have amnesia; I will have to consult my colleagues." He told me. Know I knew he must be insane. "I am not Alexis Collins I can assure you of that and I have clearly been kidnapped by you!" I said to him. His response was to tell me that my "psychosis" was worse than he had initially thought; with everything he said I grew more and more angry until finally I snapped. I lunged at him and started to attack him with my fists. We struggled for a while then two men in white clothing came into the room and injected me with something. Everything went black.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Nine: On The Same Boat

With Elsinore destroyed and Gertrude and Claudius dead Romeo decided it would be best to leave Denmark as soon as possible. We were now on a luxury cruise liner heading for New York. Romeo and I spent the days of the cruise making love, hot, sweaty, passionate love. He told me I was much better than that slutty whore Juliet; god I hated that evil bitch. On the third day of the cruise I decided that the sex had gotten rather boring so I decided to venture out of our cabin to see the rest of the ship. Romeo was fast asleep as I had slipped some sleeping pills into his coffee; all he ever wanted to do was make love not that I could blame him I was a grade A hottie. I walked down the deck of the ship until I came to the bar; I ordered a glass of chardonnay from a hunky bar tender who had been eyeing my cleavage "you like what you see?" I asked raising an eyebrow. "Yes, your breasts are rather stunning" he replied. "They didn't come cheap at $20, 0000 each" I told him. Suddenly there was a loud bang followed by the sound of screaming. Thick black smoke rose from the upper deck of the ship. I ran towards it the sound of screaming getting louder as I got closer. People were beginning to crowd around a large woman clothed entirely in red, she looked like a tomato. "What's going on?" I asked a sinister looking man who was wearing a top hat, cape and sporting a curling black moustache. He looked at me; twisted his moustache around his white gloved finger and cackled maniacally. "I wish I could say that I had caused this mayhem myself but alas I have not. This woman's problem is all her doing. This reminds me of the time I tied a young blonde ingénue to the railway tracks. She was the only on in the way of me inheriting her families entire fortune sadly I thwarted by a handsome young man" he told me. I quickly walked away from the man to ask someone who was less insane; this was easier said than done everyone in the crowd look just as crazy as the moustache guy so I just decided to ask tomato lady herself. "Hey you lady what the hell's going on?" she turned and look at me; now that I could see her face I was suddenly filled with fear, it was….Amalthea. "What's going?" she said "you want to know what's going on. Well let's see you killed my husband and now I have killed yours" she moved aside to reveal a smoking hole in the deck of the ship. "You see this hole? Below this hole is your cabin and now everything in your cabin including your Romeo is incinerated" she that started to laugh. I just stared blackly at her, she seemed confused. "Why aren't you devastated you hubby is dead?" she asked. "Because that's not my cabin; mine is at the other side of the ship which means you just incinerated someone else's cabin" she looked puzzled. "Whose cabin was this then?" she asked worriedly. Just then a nun pushed her way through the crowd to see what was happening "What in good heaven is this commotion" asked the nun. She looked down through the hole "Holy shit you just killed the orphans and their new puppies. You evil bitch!" screamed the nun. "I'm so sorry. I thought it was her husband's cabin" said Amalthea pointing a finger at me. Just then a rich looking man and woman pushed their way through the crowd "Is everything alright mother superior?" asked the gentleman. "I am afraid not Mr Roosevelt. This horrible woman incinerated the orphans, you can't adopt little Timmy now and he was really looking forwards to those new legs you were going to buy for him" said the nun. When the crowd found out what had happened the decided that the best solution was to throw Amalthea overboard, I'm sure the ocean could handle one more whale.

Back in our cabin Romeo was still asleep from the drugs so I gave him a swift and hard slap across the face. "What the hell Ariadne?" he asked. "Sorry my love by we need to leave Amalthea was hear and too many people now know too much. I fear they may know about what we did to Juliet" I told him. "Oh no we must go immediately but how? We are In the middle of the ocean" he said. I sat there on thebe trying to think of a way out of this. Then it hit me "I know we'll sink all the lifeboats but one and then sink the ship itself that was all the witnesses will be dead and we can escape to New York on the last life boat" this was my best plan yet. "Great plan Ariadne" he kissed me passionately on the lips "but how will we sink a cruise liner" he asked. "I'll go get my semtex, you go and sink all the lifeboats" he kissed me again. "I love you Ariadne" he said "yeah me too" I replied. "Please Ariadne let's make love before we do this" and so he began to remove my clothing. Once we were naked he inserted his penis into my vagina and we had intercourse it was mildly pleasurable. After about three minutes of thrusting and writhing he reached orgasm I however did not so as usual I faked it. It was the best sex yet. Much less awkward that the time in the bath at Elsinore.

After the three passionate minutes we went to work with our task of sinking the ship. I decided the best place for the explosives was the cargo bay and the engine room. Slipping it into the cargo bay was the easy part but when I got to the engine room I found that it was full of hot sweaty men who I would have to dispose of first. I took the Tommy gun I kept for special occasions out of my Gucci handbag and started to fire on the men they all stated to dance around as the bodies were riddled with bullets. What a sight it must have been seeing me stood there in an elegant red cocktail dress and white mink stole, Gucci handbag hanging from my shoulder. At least these men were getting a treat before they died. I'm sure a few of them probably died with angel lust, the thought amused. When they were all dead and the room was clear I started to set up the explosives it took me about twenty minutes to set it all up. When I had finished I stood and admired my hard work for a second and let out a loud sigh of relief that the task was over. I then went back up to the deck to see how Romeo was getting on. He was sat in the last lifeboat with all our luggage when I arrived "quick get in my love" he said to me. I climbed into the lifeboat Romeo offered a hand to help me "Oh this is the perfect night for some fireworks" I said we bot chuckled at this. Romeo began to slowly lower the lifeboat. The sound of the passengers enjoying themselves at some party in the ships saloon drifted on the cold air; at least they were all enjoying themselves before there untimely deaths. The lifeboat was nearly on the water when a voice from above said "what are you doing get the hell back up here!" it was the captain of the ship. He began to reel the lifeboat back up toward the deck. "What shall we do?" asked Romeo, I ignored him and fumbled around in my purse "ah ha" I said taking a revolver from it. I aimed the revolver at the captain's head; I pulled the trigger; a shot rang out. I had shot the captain point black between the eyes; he fell backwards dead as that slutty cheerleader I buried beneath the bleachers that cold December morning.

We had gotten the lifeboat in the water without any further problems and we had sailed far enough away to not be affected by the sinking of the ship. I picked up the detonator for the explosives and Romeo poured two flutes of exquisite chilled Champagne "a toast to the good ship Survivor" Romeo said. As we raised our glasses I pressed the button of the detonator. We both watched as the ship's hull was ripped apart by the explosion; then came the screams of the doomed passengers. "Ah what a romantic evening just looked at stars glistening" I said and then we kissed in the moonlight the screams of terror behind us fading away into silence.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Ten: New York, New York

Our little lifeboat pitched and tossed on the rough sea; Romeo was leaning over the side throwing up and I just sat staring at the ocean hoping that I would spot land on the horizon sometime soon. We had been stuck like this for three day and our food and water was running short. Somewhere at the back of my mind I thought our decision to leave and then sink the cruise liner had been a bit rash but Romeo sat it was the best thing we could do and I guess he was right. "Are you feeling any better honey?" I asked; he replied with a loud "blaghhghh" which I took to mean no. I went back to staring at the horizon still there was no sign of dry land. "DAMN! Will we ever get to New York?" I started sobbing. Suddenly a thick fog swallowed us it seemed to have come out of nowhere; I could no longer see the horizon I could barely see my own hand in front of my face. "Romeo I don't like this fog we could get lost" He managed to pull himself from over the edge of the boat "don't worry Ariadne we'll get through this" he said. Suddenly there was a thud and the whole boat shook. "What the hell was that" Romeo screamed. As if to answer his question the fog began to clear to reveal the obstacle we had just hit; to both of our surprise and joy it was the goddamn Statue of Liberty. "We're hear finally New York City!" I shouted with glee.

New York was just as I had dreamed it. The lights of the city were so blinding and beautiful. Growing up in a small town like Verona I had never imagined that such thing as this could exist; I was surrounded by colossal towers that reached for the heavens, beautiful store fronts with mannequins wearing the latest fashions and the people; the wonderful people of New York City, stars of Broadway, musicians, fashion designers, models and Manhattan socialites all busy with their lives. "Oh Romeo this is wonderful, I can finally become a star of the theatre like I always dreamed and you can finally be a stock broker on Wall Street." I said to my sexy hubby "I cannot wait to be a Stock Broker." He said in reply. We were on 42nd street walking off our tired feet. We had just walked past a theatre when some dame wearing ostrich feathers on her head came out "I quit Mister Goldberg you dirty old man! Find another chorus girl to molest." She shouted into the door angrily. She was in such a rush to get away from the theatre that she walked straight into Romeo the both landed on the street with a thud. "Hey watch where ya walking" she said to Romeo who seemed to be unconscious. "Oh I'm so sorry for my husband's klutziness" I said the ex-chorus girl as I helped her to her feet. "No Problem sweet heart" she said "The name's Medea" she told me "I'm Ariadne" I said "I see you're in show business" "was I can't go back to work for that pervert Goldberg" she said "Oh that's a shame I was looking for someone who knew the biz. I want to be a star you see and I'm new in town and I need someone to show me the ropes." I told her "well I guess you could come to some auditions with me, let's go" she said "okay". We left Romeo passed out on the sidewalk he would find his own way back to the hotel.

"…care for me stay little Valentine, stay each day is Valentine's Day." The shrill and very drunk coloratura soprano finally finished singing, well screeching. Mister Green frowned at the ancient woman standing on the stage and said "Look sweetheart you just aint gonna work as a chorus girl. The fact that you're drunk is one thing but you must be what? A hundred. And listen babe who ever told you that you are a good singer must've been as hammered as you are. That has to have been the worst rendition of my funny valentine I have ever heard. Now please babe get out!" with this the woman burst into tears. She then took a revolver out of her bag and shot herself on stage. Mister Green frowned once more then shouted to a stage hand "Hey Larry get the dead broad off my stage I still have more ladies to audition." As Larry dragged the wrinkly carcass off the stage Medea turned to me and said "Isn't he just amazing, I hear he's the best director in town" suddenly Green shouted "NEXT!" "Oh my god! That's me." said Medea I told her to break a leg and she walked calmly up onto the stage. "So baby what ya gonna sing?" Asked Mr Green "Caro nome" replied Medea, she opened her mouth to start singing but suddenly froze her face began to contort as if she were in pain and she said in a booming and unrecognisable voice "THE PRESENCE IS WATCHING…ALWAYS WATCHING… ONLY THE CHOSEN ONE CAN STOP THE PRESENCE…YOU ARE THE CHOSEN ONE!" She pointed at me. She then screeched and fell to the floor of the stage unconscious. "Who keeps sending me these crazy dames?" Said Mister Green "Can someone get this broad to a hospital?" I myself offered to take her but only after my audition I decided to sing Wagner's "Der Ring des Nibelugen" in its entirety which I sang perfectly as I am fluent in German. After the audition Mister Green gave me a job as head chorus girl. After that I went with the ambulance and Medea to the hospital. The doctors told me that she would be fine and that I should go home and get some rest; so I did as they said.

I arrived back at the hotel at around nine; I had expected to find Romeo in bed but when I entered the hotel room I noticed that there was something wrong the air was cold and Romeo was nowhere to be seen. The room itself was a mess a lamp had been knocked onto the floor and the curtains had been pulled down. The widow was wide open I knew something was terribly wrong "Romeo?" I shouted "Romeo where are you?" but it was futile he did not answer. Then I noticed the blood; there wasn't much of it but a few droplets had stained the white carpet crimson; it trailed off into the bathroom. I was apprehensive to go inside but still I gripped the cold iron door knob and turned it and was faced with darkness. The bathroom was even colder than the bedroom I started to shiver; I grasped in the darkness for the light cord and finally found it in my hand I pulled it and a stark white light revealed to me something horrible. Written on the white tiles in dripping blood was a message that sent chills down my spine "We The Presence have taken your husband to Middlewich Hollow" I fell to my knees and began to weep. Then I composed myself as I realised that crying wouldn't get Romeo back I had to go to this Middlewich Hollow but I couldn't go alone since Medea had some connection to this The Presence she would have to help.


End file.
